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#7051 | | Having a baby isn't so bad. If you're a female Emperor penguin in the Antarctic. She lays the egg, rolls it over to the father, then takes off for warmer weather where she eats and eats and eats. For two months, the father stands stiff, without food, blind in the 24-hour dark, balancing the egg on his feet. After the little penguin is hatched, the mother sees fit to come home. -- L.M. Boyd, "Austin American-Statesman"
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#7052 | | He gave her a look that you could have poured on a waffle.
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#7053 | | He who enters his wife's dressing room is a philosopher or a fool. -- Balzac
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#7054 | | He who is intoxicated with wine will be sober again in the course of the night, but he who is intoxicated by the cupbearer will not recover his senses until the day of judgement. -- Saadi
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#7055 | | Hey, Jim, it's me, Susie Lillis from the laundromat. You said you were gonna call and it's been two weeks. What's wrong, you lose my number?
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#7056 | | High heels are a device invented by a woman who was tired of being kissed on the forehead.
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#7057 | | Him: "Your skin is so soft. Are you a model?" Her: "No," [blush] "I'm a cosmetologist." Him: "Really? That's incredible... It must be very tough to handle weightlessness." -- "The Jerk"
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#7058 | | His designs were strictly honourable, as the phrase is: that is, to rob a lady of her fortune by way of marriage. -- Henry Fielding, "Tom Jones"
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#7059 | | "Home, Sweet Home" must surely have been written by a bachelor. -- Samuel Butler
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#7060 | | Horace's best ode would not please a young woman as much as the mediocre verses of the young man she is in love with. -- Moore
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