 fortune index all fortunes
| | #6321 | | It is illegal to say "Oh, Boy" in Jonesboro, Georgia.
| | | #6322 | | It is Mr. Mellon's credo that $200,000,000 can do no wrong. Our
offense consists in doubting it.
-- Justice Robert H. Jackson
| | | #6323 | | It is Texas law that when two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing,
each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other
has gone.
| | | #6324 | | It seems these two guys, George and Harry, set out in a Hot Air
balloon to cross the United States. After forty hours in the air, George
turned to Harry, and said, "Harry, I think we've drifted off course! We
need to find out where we are."
Harry cools the air in the balloon, and they descend to below the
cloud cover. Slowly drifting over the countryside, George spots a man
standing below them and yells out, "Excuse me! Can you please tell me
where we are?"
The man on the ground yells back, "You're in a balloon, approximately
fifty feet in the air!"
George turns to Harry and says, "Well, that man *must* be a lawyer".
Replies Harry, "How can you tell?".
"Because the information he gave us is 100% accurate, and totally
useless!"
That's the end of The Joke, but for you people who are still worried about
George and Harry: they end up in the drink, and make the front page of the
New York Times: "Balloonists Soaked by Lawyer".
| | | #6325 | | It shall be unlawful for any suspicious person to be within the municipality.
-- Local ordinance, Euclid Ohio
| | | #6326 | | It's illegal in Wilbur, Washington, to ride an ugly horse.
| | | #6327 | | It's recently come to Fortune's attention that scientists have stopped
using laboratory rats in favor of attorneys. Seems that there are not
only more of them, but you don't get so emotionally attached. The only
difficulty is that it's sometimes difficult to apply the experimental
results to humans.
[Also, there are some things even a rat won't do. Ed.]
| | | #6328 | | Judges, as a class, display, in the matter of arranging alimony, that
reckless generosity which is found only in men who are giving away
someone else's cash.
-- P.G. Wodehouse, "Louder and Funnier"
| | | #6329 | | Just remember: when you go to court, you are trusting your fate to
twelve people that weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty!
| | | #6330 | | Kansas state law requires pedestrians crossing the highways at night to
wear tail lights.
| | | | ... ... |
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