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#5401 | | Where do you go to get anorexia? -- Shelley Winters
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#5402 | | While it may be true that a watched pot never boils, the one you don't keep an eye on can make an awful mess of your stove. -- Edward Stevenson
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#5403 | | Whoever tells a lie cannot be pure in heart -- and only the pure in heart can make a good soup. -- Ludwig Van Beethoven
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#5404 | | Why do so many foods come packaged in plastic? It's quite uncanny.
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#5405 | | Why do they call a fast a fast, when it goes so slow?
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#5406 | | Without coffee he could not work, or at least he could not have worked in the way he did. In addition to paper and pens, he took with him everywhere as an indispensable article of equipment the coffee machine, which was no less important to him than his table or his white robe. -- Stefan Zweigs, Biography of Balzac
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#5407 | | Without ice cream life and fame are meaningless.
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#5408 | | You can always tell the Christmas season is here when you start getting incredibly dense, tinfoil-and-ribbon- wrapped lumps in the mail. Fruitcakes make ideal gifts because the Postal Service has been unable to find a way to damage them. They last forever, largely because nobody ever eats them. In fact, many smart people save the fruitcakes they receive and send them back to the original givers the next year; some fruitcakes have been passed back and forth for hundreds of years.
The easiest way to make a fruitcake is to buy a darkish cake, then pound some old, hard fruit into it with a mallet. Be sure to wear safety glasses. -- Dave Barry, "Simple, Homespun Gifts"
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#5409 | | You don't sew with a fork, so I see no reason to eat with knitting needles. -- Miss Piggy, on eating Chinese Food
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#5410 | | You first parents of the human race... who ruined yourself for an apple, what might you have done for a truffled turkey? -- Brillat-savarin, "Physiologie du Gout"
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